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Real meaning of Some Common words 1. Love affairs: Something like cricket where one-day internationals are more popular than a five day test.
2. Marriage: It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her master
3. Divorce: Future tense of marriage
4. Lecture: An art of transferring information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds of either".
5.Conference: The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.
6. Compromise: The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.
7. Tears: The hydraulic force by which masculine will-power is defeated by feminine water-power. ..
8. Dictionary: A place where divorce comes before marriage.
9. Conference Room: A place where everybody talks, nobody listens & everybody disagrees later on.
10. Ecstasy: A feeling when you feel you are going to feel a feeling you have never felt before.
11. Classic: books which people praise, but do not read.
12. Smile: A curve that can set a lot of things straight.
13. Office: A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.
14. Yawn: The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.
15. Etc.: A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.
16. Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.
17. Experience: The name men give to their mistakes.
18. Atom Bomb: An invention to end all inventions.
19. Philosopher: A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken of when dead.
20. Diplomat: A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.
21. Opportunist: A person who starts taking bath if he accidentally falls into a river.
22. Optimist: A person who while falling from Eiffel Tower says in midway "See I am not injured yet."
23. Pessimist: A person who says that O is the last letter in ZERO, instead of the first letter in word OPPORTUNITY.
24. Miser: A person who lives poor so that he can die rich.
25. Father: A banker provided by nature.
26. Criminal: A guy no different from the rest... except that he got caught.
27. Boss: Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.
28. Politician: One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence after?
29. Doctor: A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you with his bills.
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Originally Posted by money_ms 
