India Broadband Forum

06-13-09, 09:22 PM

Banta called his friend, Santa, and told him that he recently met the woman of his dreams. Now what should he do?

Santa said, "Send her some flowers, and on the card invite her for a home-cooked meal."

Banta liked the idea, so he invited the woman.

The day after the meal Santa calls Banta and asks about the meal.

Banta, "It was a flop idea."

Santa, "Didn't the girl come to your house?"

Banta, "She did, but she refused to cook!"

rohit3221 · 06-13-09, 11:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by saurav_k

Banta called his friend, Santa, and told him that he recently met the woman of his dreams. Now what should he do?

Santa said, "Send her some flowers, and on the card invite her for a home-cooked meal."

Banta liked the idea, so he invited the woman.

The day after the meal Santa calls Banta and asks about the meal.

Banta, "It was a flop idea."

Santa, "Didn't the girl come to your house?"

Banta, "She did, but she refused to cook!"

gud one..

mickey · 06-13-09, 11:29 PM

machbio · 06-14-09, 12:51 AM

ha ha.. good thread guys...

06-15-09, 07:52 PM

Good one

06-16-09, 01:40 PM

Santa: My mobile bill how much?
Call centre girl: Sir, just dial 123 to know current bill status
Santa: Stupid, not CURRENT BILL my MOBILE BILL.

Banta built 2 Swimming Pools. And he left one of them unfilled?
When asked him, he said,
"Oye, that's for those who don't know Swimming.

Banta: I think that girl is deaf.
Friend: How do u know?
Banta: I told I Love her, but she said her chappals (Shoes) are new

Santa: Miss, Did u call me on my mobile?
Teacher: Me? No, why?
Santa: Yesterday I saw in my mobile- 1 Miss Call".

Judge: Don't U have shame? It is d 3rd time U R coming to court.
Banta to judge: U R coming daily, don't U have shame?

Sir: What is difference between Orange and Apple?
Santa: Color of Orange is orange, but color of Apple is not APPLE.

Santa in airplane going to Bombay . While its landing he was excited and shouted: " Bombay ... Bombay "
Air hostess said: "B silent."
Santa: "Ok. Ombay. Ombay"

Banta got a sms from his girl friend: "I MISS YOU"
Banta replied: "I Mr. YOU" !!.

After finishing MBBS Banta started his practice.
He Checked 1st Patient's Eyes, Tongue & Ears with a Torch & Finally Said: "Oye, Torch is okay"

06-16-09, 01:44 PM

Quiet old but nonetheless good one

06-16-09, 07:39 PM

Santa Last Painting..
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How do santa take xerox of word document?
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06-17-09, 03:00 PM

Reps+ GC ..

06-17-09, 03:02 PM

....Good one GC

06-17-09, 03:06 PM

Prince Charles & Santa were having dinner.
Prince said, "Pass the wine you divine".
Santa thinks "how poetic" and says, "pass the custard you b*st*rd".

************************************************** *******

Boss : Am giving u job as a driver. STARTING salary Rs.2000/-, is it o.k
Santa: U R great sir! Starting salary is o.k.......but? ? how much is DRIVING salary...?

************************************************** *******

Santa and Banta are driving a Car. Santa puts on the indicator and asks Banta to check whether its working.... Banta puts his head out and says YES...NO...YES. ..NO...YES.. ..NO...

************************************************** ***

Santa & Banta are looking at an Egyptian mummy.
Santa : Look so many bandages, pakka lorry accident case.
Banta : Aaho, lorry number is also written...BC 1760!!!....

****************************************

Santa for an exam had studied only one essay 'FRIEND', but in the exam the essay which came was 'FATHER' . He replaced friend with fatherin the essay and it read:
I AM A VERY FATHERLY PERSON, I HAVE LOTS OF FATHERS, SOME OF MY FATHERS ARE MALE AND SOME ARE FEMALE. MY TRUEFATHER IS MY NEIGHBOUR.

************************************

06-17-09, 03:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by saurav_k

Prince Charles & Santa were having dinner.
Prince said, "Pass the wine you divine".
Santa thinks "how poetic" and says, "pass the custard you b*st*rd".

06-17-09, 03:18 PM

Plz Rate this thread..

06-17-09, 03:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by saurav_k

Plz Rate this thread..

done...

thandakid · 06-17-09, 07:57 PM

awsome collection

06-17-09, 11:25 PM

Good one

06-19-09, 02:49 PM

Banta Singh:IN-FLIGHT ANNOUNCEMENT

Gud marning, Ladies and Gen'lemen. P'rajee aur Behnjee. Sat Sri Akal.

On behalf of Captaan Balbir Singh 'Bobby', this is your Flight Supervisor Banta Singh "Bunty" welcoming to you on the P'njaab Airways flight no. 9211 (Nau Do Gyaraah) to Ludhiana.

We apalogize for the two-day delay in taking off, b'cause the sun was not shining brightly in the fog. And we are knowing the sun does not shine in the night.

Landing in Ludhiana is not dafinite, but with good luck we can be landing d'rectly in your v'llage.

P'njaab Airways has exc'llant record for safety. In fact our safety standards are so high that even the fully trained tarrists and hijackers are afraid to fly with us.

I am pleased to 'nounce that starting this year over 90% of our p'ssaingers have reached to their dest'nation.

For the rest 10%, the P'njaab Airways staff has lots of experience for consoling the next-of-kin. Our Hostess Bubbly Kaur will be haippy to brief you on our out-of-court settlement policies.

If engines are too noisy, on p'ssainger request, we can turn them off for comfart, but your flight will become late and you may become the late also.

For our religious p'ssaingers, we are the only airline who can help you to contact God at once. In case of sudden loss of cabin pressure, Holy Books will be quickly distributed.

We regret that today's in-flight movie will not be shown as we could not record it from the tallyvision due to power cut.

But we will be flying right naxt to Air India, where their movie can be seen from the right side cabin windows. These windows have been opened

For your viewing convenience. For p'ssaingers on left side, we have put binoculars under the seat.

If AirIndia flight is again cancelled, then for your in-flight ent'tainment. Our hostesses Bubbly Kaur & Cuckoo Kaur will do the Bhangra with flight stewards Pappu and Tappu. Oye, Balle Balle!!

Your in-flight Menu has a choice of Chicken Tikka Masala, Tandoori Fish, Dal makhani, unlimited P'ronthas and Lassi.

There is a half charge for Red Label Whiskey served from Black Label bottles. Patiala pegs will be served only on Patiala flights.

As per safety rules, smoking is not allowed on all P'njaab Airways flights over P'njaab. Any smoke you see in the cabin is only the early warning system on the engines.

Please do read the 'structions on the Safety Card in seat pocket in your front side. It is not a hand fan.

The P'ssainger behind you must read the card in your backside.

Life jackets are placed under your seats for emergency water landings on any of our 5 rivers. Do not use life jackets on the land.

Kindly keep your seat in upright position for take-off & landing. Also do not use force. Broken seats will not be replaced and you will be tied to the floor during take off and landing.

Please be seated first and then fasten your seatbelts. Do not call for steward or airhostess for a glass of water when plane is taking off.

We are about to take-off. We wish you a pleasant flight. For air sikness problems we have echo friendly jute bags in the sit pokets

Thank you once again for flying with P'njaab Airways

06-19-09, 03:28 PM

Good one

06-19-09, 03:48 PM

Nice one ... GC

06-19-09, 04:07 PM

What happen to your avatar?

06-17-09, 03:00 PM	#29
saurav_k Guest Posts: n/a	Reps+ GC .. Last edited by saurav_k; 06-17-09 at 03:00 PM. Reason: Automerged Doublepost

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06-13-09, 09:22 PM	#21
saurav_k Guest Posts: n/a	Banta called his friend, Santa, and told him that he recently met the woman of his dreams. Now what should he do? Santa said, "Send her some flowers, and on the card invite her for a home-cooked meal." Banta liked the idea, so he invited the woman. The day after the meal Santa calls Banta and asks about the meal. Banta, "It was a flop idea." Santa, "Didn't the girl come to your house?" Banta, "She did, but she refused to cook!"

06-13-09, 11:29 PM	#23
mickey Senior Member & Mod Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: Delhi Posts: 3,303 Blog Entries: 3 Rep Power: 8

06-14-09, 12:51 AM	#24
machbio Junior Member Join Date: Dec 2008 Age: 21 Posts: 24 Rep Power: 1	ha ha.. good thread guys...

06-16-09, 01:40 PM	#26
saurav_k Guest Posts: n/a	Santa: My mobile bill how much? Call centre girl: Sir, just dial 123 to know current bill status Santa: Stupid, not CURRENT BILL my MOBILE BILL. Banta built 2 Swimming Pools. And he left one of them unfilled? When asked him, he said, "Oye, that's for those who don't know Swimming. Banta: I think that girl is deaf. Friend: How do u know? Banta: I told I Love her, but she said her chappals (Shoes) are new Santa: Miss, Did u call me on my mobile? Teacher: Me? No, why? Santa: Yesterday I saw in my mobile- 1 Miss Call". Judge: Don't U have shame? It is d 3rd time U R coming to court. Banta to judge: U R coming daily, don't U have shame? Sir: What is difference between Orange and Apple? Santa: Color of Orange is orange, but color of Apple is not APPLE. Santa in airplane going to Bombay . While its landing he was excited and shouted: " Bombay ... Bombay " Air hostess said: "B silent." Santa: "Ok. Ombay. Ombay" Banta got a sms from his girl friend: "I MISS YOU" Banta replied: "I Mr. YOU" !!. After finishing MBBS Banta started his practice. He Checked 1st Patient's Eyes, Tongue & Ears with a Torch & Finally Said: "Oye, Torch is okay"

06-16-09, 01:44 PM	#27
gothic_coder Guest Posts: n/a	Quiet old but nonetheless good one

06-17-09, 03:06 PM	#31
saurav_k Guest Posts: n/a	Prince Charles & Santa were having dinner. Prince said, "Pass the wine you divine". Santa thinks "how poetic" and says, "pass the custard you bstrd". ************************************************ *** Boss : Am giving u job as a driver. STARTING salary Rs.2000/-, is it o.k Santa: U R great sir! Starting salary is o.k.......but? ? how much is DRIVING salary...? ********************************************** *** Santa and Banta are driving a Car. Santa puts on the indicator and asks Banta to check whether its working.... Banta puts his head out and says YES...NO...YES. ..NO...YES.. ..NO... ********************************************** * Santa & Banta are looking at an Egyptian mummy. Santa : Look so many bandages, pakka lorry accident case. Banta : Aaho, lorry number is also written...BC 1760!!!.... ************************************** Santa for an exam had studied only one essay 'FRIEND', but in the exam the essay which came was 'FATHER' . He replaced friend with fatherin the essay and it read: I AM A VERY FATHERLY PERSON, I HAVE LOTS OF FATHERS, SOME OF MY FATHERS ARE MALE AND SOME ARE FEMALE. MY TRUEFATHER IS MY NEIGHBOUR. **********************************

06-17-09, 03:18 PM	#33
saurav_k Guest Posts: n/a	Plz Rate this thread..

06-17-09, 07:57 PM	#35
thandakid Junior Member Join Date: Jun 2009 Posts: 28 Rep Power: 1	awsome collection

06-19-09, 02:49 PM	#37
gothic_coder Guest Posts: n/a	Banta Singh:IN-FLIGHT ANNOUNCEMENT Gud marning, Ladies and Gen'lemen. P'rajee aur Behnjee. Sat Sri Akal. On behalf of Captaan Balbir Singh 'Bobby', this is your Flight Supervisor Banta Singh "Bunty" welcoming to you on the P'njaab Airways flight no. 9211 (Nau Do Gyaraah) to Ludhiana. We apalogize for the two-day delay in taking off, b'cause the sun was not shining brightly in the fog. And we are knowing the sun does not shine in the night. Landing in Ludhiana is not dafinite, but with good luck we can be landing d'rectly in your v'llage. P'njaab Airways has exc'llant record for safety. In fact our safety standards are so high that even the fully trained tarrists and hijackers are afraid to fly with us. I am pleased to 'nounce that starting this year over 90% of our p'ssaingers have reached to their dest'nation. For the rest 10%, the P'njaab Airways staff has lots of experience for consoling the next-of-kin. Our Hostess Bubbly Kaur will be haippy to brief you on our out-of-court settlement policies. If engines are too noisy, on p'ssainger request, we can turn them off for comfart, but your flight will become late and you may become the late also. For our religious p'ssaingers, we are the only airline who can help you to contact God at once. In case of sudden loss of cabin pressure, Holy Books will be quickly distributed. We regret that today's in-flight movie will not be shown as we could not record it from the tallyvision due to power cut. But we will be flying right naxt to Air India, where their movie can be seen from the right side cabin windows. These windows have been opened For your viewing convenience. For p'ssaingers on left side, we have put binoculars under the seat. If AirIndia flight is again cancelled, then for your in-flight ent'tainment. Our hostesses Bubbly Kaur & Cuckoo Kaur will do the Bhangra with flight stewards Pappu and Tappu. Oye, Balle Balle!! Your in-flight Menu has a choice of Chicken Tikka Masala, Tandoori Fish, Dal makhani, unlimited P'ronthas and Lassi. There is a half charge for Red Label Whiskey served from Black Label bottles. Patiala pegs will be served only on Patiala flights. As per safety rules, smoking is not allowed on all P'njaab Airways flights over P'njaab. Any smoke you see in the cabin is only the early warning system on the engines. Please do read the 'structions on the Safety Card in seat pocket in your front side. It is not a hand fan. The P'ssainger behind you must read the card in your backside. Life jackets are placed under your seats for emergency water landings on any of our 5 rivers. Do not use life jackets on the land. Kindly keep your seat in upright position for take-off & landing. Also do not use force. Broken seats will not be replaced and you will be tied to the floor during take off and landing. Please be seated first and then fasten your seatbelts. Do not call for steward or airhostess for a glass of water when plane is taking off. We are about to take-off. We wish you a pleasant flight. For air sikness problems we have echo friendly jute bags in the sit pokets Thank you once again for flying with P'njaab Airways

06-19-09, 03:48 PM	#39
saurav_k Guest Posts: n/a	Nice one ... GC

06-19-09, 04:07 PM	#40
gothic_coder Guest Posts: n/a	What happen to your avatar?