India Broadband Forum

Swifty

>Windows - The colorful clown suit for DOS
>Windows - a solitaire game that requires 16 MB and HD
>if Windows is user-friendly, why do you need a 678-page manual?
>Bang on the LEFT side of your computer to restart Windows
>This virus requires Microsoft Windows
>Windows - a virus with mouse support
>Windows has the ability to screw up 2 things at the same time !
>Difference between a virus and windows ? Viruses rarely fail.
>Mouse not present - click twice to continue...
>Have you crashed your Windows today?
>customer: I'm running Windows...
Helpdesk: Yes...
Customer: ...and now my computer stopped working !
Helpdesk: Yes, you already said that.

meetdilip

Good one Rohit. Do you belong to anti Windows clan.

Luke Skywalker

I do belong to anti Sony anti Microsoft & other big corporate which are against us. But not against a product.

Swifty

no

Sid

Nice ones Rohit

Swifty

At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated:

"If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving twenty-five dollar cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon."

In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release stating (by Mr. Welch himself):

"If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics:

1) For no reason whatsoever your car would crash twice a day.
2) Every time they painted new lines on the road you would have to buy a new car.
3) Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason, and you would just accept this, restart and drive on.
4) Occasionally, executing a manoeuvre such as a left turn, would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.
5) Only one person at a time could use the car, unless you bought "Car95" or "CarNT". But then you would have to buy more seats.
6) Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, reliable, five times as fast, and twice as easy to drive, but would only run on five percent of the roads.
7) The oil, water temperature and alternator warning lights would be replaced by a single "general car default" warning light.
8) New seats would force everyone to have the same size butt.
9) The airbag system would say "Are you sure?" before going off.
10) Occasionally for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key, and grab hold of the radio antenna.
11) GM would also require all car buyers to also purchase a deluxe set of Rand McNally road maps (now a GM subsidiary), even though they neither need them nor want them. Attempting to delete this option would immediately cause the car's performance to diminish by 50% or more. Moreover, GM would become a target for investigation by the Justice Department.
12) Every time GM introduced a new model car buyers would have to learn how to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.
13) You'd press the "start" button to shut off the engine.

gothic_coder

Here

Swifty