Thread: Live In Relationships Is Indian Society is Ready For This

New research at the University of Warwick, United Kingdom, claims married men and women derive satisfaction from their spouse's happiness unlike those people who live together without marriage.

Nick Powdthavee, who carried out the study, looked into the lives of 9,704 married individuals and found a married person is significantly happier in life if his/ her partner is leading a cheerful life.

He found no sign of such an effect on couples who are cohabiting.

The research reveals the institution of marriage induces the habit of sharing among spouses who not only share their material belongings; they also try to be part of every aspect of each other's life through smooth and rough times.

What do you think about Live in Relationships as this trend is catching up in Metros and more n more couples are living together before marriage

There seem to be various perspectives. Sometimes people say they want to see what it's like living with this person before they do something as serious as marriage. Under that consider some people believe in divorce while others do not. Others will live together, and consider themselves partners for decades and still not get married. Then others just... well... it's taboo to do so, either way. I think it all falls under the ideal that marriage is that "huge "step" people take, couples take and so they feel they have a duty to be nice and happy with their partners. Honestly, regardless if you're married or not, your partners happiness, the main/major surrounding you have in your life - when you get home the first face you see, what affects your life in every way - should certainly be a huge issue! Why not care if they are happy or not? Guess what... you not caring is what makes them unhappy, hence you are unhappy, hence the relationship goes to junk, hence more and more people follow this trend, hence less and less people come to terms with simply being kind - whether it's your partner or your wife! If you know you are going to be seeing someone, more than for the next 2 minutes, why be unkind? All it is is a huge reflection of yourself! There is a saying that "birds of a feather, flock together." I say be kind to people. You want to feel great, loved, appreciated? Do the same for your partner.

Originally Posted by kinkPOP

you not caring is what makes them unhappy, hence you are unhappy, hence the relationship goes to junk, hence more and more people follow this trend, hence less and less people come to terms with simply being kind

Now i am sure we are talking about relationships , started getting views and posts in this section too

No the Indian society is not ready for livein relationships..

Most parents will have a fit if they came to know theier son or daughter is living with some one
Yeh youngsters dont mind and here in Delhi there are so many students who live with their partners but this is not very widespread.

ya if you talk about delhi then khirki extn and sheikh sarai near malviya nagar are full of live in relations, where you can go and live without being asked like with whome you are living and what is the relation. It is really very open now but still our society is not willing to accept it.
I know few of my friends who are in livin relation and they really feel good about this decision and even i don't found this to be a bad idea at all coz this can give you a good time and chance to understand your partner.

Live in relationships r kool... I personally b'lieve Gals can b better friends or roomies than boys... One just has to take the courage to live it atleast once... Live in relationships has its obvious benefits over marriage such as space, choice & just personal responsibility... Since the Supreme Court has givn it a status at par with marriage, there hardly exists any difference for me, I mite as well go in for matrimony as my parents b'lieve in that...

Live in is a very practical arrangement since pre-marital sex doesn’t remain an issue with the youth today and such an arrangement doesn’t tie you up like in the case of marriage...

The pros and cons of both arrangements hv always been before us, its just that we dont fear the consequences nemore... For those who b'lieve its a cultural violation it wud never gain respect and for those who are moving with the times, “It is part of life and it’s ever changing face!!”
Either ways the choice is urs and urs alone. Like it’s said, “Nothing is right or wrong: Thinking makes it so”...

It is just a matter of perception, one can take a marriage as a live-in arrangement or have a live-in like marriage...

but still its not very welcome in our society

Originally Posted by sb21pro

but still its not very welcome in our society

Yeah, I agree with u on that... The institution of marriage is a very old concept... If we were to go back in time, we wud not only find matrimony but even polygamy, a practice that thankfully is no more a part of our culture. Its hard to deny a fact that in a country like ours, family plays a huge role and marriage seemingly is the stepping stone or rather the foundation of nurturing this concept...

But the traditional arguments and beliefs hvnt been able to restrain the current fast paced generation from finding a convenient solution... ‘Live-in’, a concept initially viewed as one of the adverse affects of westernization has now carved a niche in sum strata of the society. Its no more a mere rebellious statement made by young adults but a mature decision...

Though such a relationship or an arrangement has always been under the ethical radar and vigil of so called moral police of society, these days it is just a matter of saving money for many... Sharing a room with a gal/boy nowadays doesn’t necessarily mean one involving a sexual, emotional connection but it just might be more on a platonic level that helps a working professional increase his/her savings...

Indian society wont welcome this.......
As a youth many of us would welcome this.....
Think from a parent's point of view....
Would you allow ur daughter or son (If you have) in such a relationship....

Originally Posted by jee.ramesh1983

Think from a parent's point of view....
Would you allow ur daughter or son (If you have) in such a relationship....

As I already said... World changing fast dude... Some things might not b in our control when the next generation shows up... & if I ever become a parent, I wudn't like to take control of such things which will be beyond my reach...

Its all about ur perception of things buddy... U either like it, or hate it... I'm one of the formers...

Ya...everybody has his own perception. Iam dont like this...

Guys Take it this way...

Those who do not want to sensitise themselves to the feelings of their counterpart (The Other Sex) opt for Live-In.'
This is a fact.
On the contrary it does not mean that they are NOT Sensitive. They are but the term 'Live-In' rejects to senses.
Ready for responsibility ? Marriage is the next thing.

As far as our society is concerned... its not really welcome affair. Why ? Marriage is not only a ritual !! In fact the start of Relationship is marked by a Ritual (Marriage).... Relationship Is Necessary !! Some call it Live-In...

I know many of us Boys or I will say everyone loves to be in these kinds of relationship, but can you accept that one of your female family member is in the same relation with someone???

NO, Indian Society is not ready for it.

Is it? A big NO

Well.. Indian society is slowly getting accustomed to it.. I've myself seen it in my friend circle... Infact One of my friend is in 'live in' relation with a girl at his parent's home(Pune)... Girl's parent also know bout it(Hydbad)... they r as kool as my friends parent...

There r 2 more couples I know who live together along with girl's brother(in both cases) in knowledge of their parents... Both brothers never had any problem... And both couples are from Patna... Their parents visit them every now & then... If people from small cities r kool bout it... think of wots going on in metropolitan cities... people there r much more liberal... I can share few more examples which I know... but I guess it will be too much for the stomach of many people here... lol...

Heehee... Like I mentioned... a live-in-relationship can be very tricky. They can destroy the relationship, especially respect-wise, they can do a lot of harm to the values the parents have tried to instill in their children... and... well... overall, sometimes it's selfish vs. selfish. The kids are selfish for wanting it, the parents selfish for not wanting it. The thing is, I think, people really have to measure their values and truly see what they are getting into. There is a lot... very serious, sometimes, things that can come along with living with your partner. It has to be a decision made with some wisdom at hand.

Originally Posted by itsmemad

As I already said... World changing fast dude... Some things might not b in our control when the next generation shows up... & if I ever become a parent, I wudn't like to take control of such things which will be beyond my reach...

Its all about ur perception of things buddy... U either like it, or hate it... I'm one of the formers...

Yes the world is changing fast but Indian isn't as fast as yet. The idea simply comes from the advanced and western countries and it is then applied to India, basically what we see happening in other countries we want to do. But again The Indian society is not yet used to this idea and the way things are in India its not good, i mean the amount of rapes, murders and etc, which all adds up to why this isn't accepted as of yet along with culture being a reason.
One other main reason is why it is not allowed is that the people who live in India make others lives hell by talking about them, and no one can live their own lives.

I neither think this is right or wrong, because it depends on the age of a person, the maturity and the reasons for living, like i said with the amount of rapes, murders going on which parent would want to allow their boy to live with a girl or their girl to live with a boy, without having no information about who they are and what they do.

If you are someone of the age of 23 and above and want to live in with your fiance or long time boyfriend then that is something different to talk about and in this case there are some parents who agree on this.

But in my opinion its not necessary to be able to live in with someone to see if you can cope or be with them, and mean what next after this, trial period for having kids!

Originally Posted by Preeti_20

One other main reason is why it is not allowed is that the people who live in India make others lives hell by talking about them, and no one can live their own lives.

Very true...

It is not question of "right or wrong" or "moral or immoral". That is not the question. There may be stray incidences when live-in relationship happen with the parents knowing about it. But Indian society frowns upon on this.

Question: Is the society ready as yet?
Answer: No. When we cannot have programs with adult content, proper sex education, a willingness to look outside the well, this is too much to ask for.

In time, maybe we will be ready.

well tell me ,will we allow this to our children?

Originally Posted by just4kix

In time, maybe we will be ready.

Yes, It might take just 1 more generation to become a common thing...

Originally Posted by sb21pro

well tell me ,will we allow this to our children?

Future is very unpredictable... but yes, if we prepare ourselves b4... nobody will b hurt... just incase... u never know...

well it depends on how society is then, what the situation in India is like then, it may be worse or better no one knows. Or another question no one knows where we may be settled, we may still be in India or be living abroad.

But i think personally i wouldn't let my kids my live in with their partners, its not good, you can't live in with someone to see what their like how your relationship will be, because at the end of the day if they turn around and say no they don't get along, how many more times will they do this and try living in with someone else to see if things work out or not. This situation of saying no to their partners will be more open when a living in situation arises, if it doesn't it will be mutual to understand your husband or wife, other wise it will be taken for granted.

One thing has to be taken into consideration a married life is totally different from a life of a boyfriend and girlfriend or even engaged couples.

Hmmm ... interesting topic
Well ... Indian Society def is not yet ready for the Live In concept ... Like Admin said most parent would have a fit if their children were into a 'live in' ...that being said , so what makes a 'live in' different from a marriage ? ...In India , that would mean a lot of gossip about you behind your back ... And people branding u as an immoral .... Well i have observed that south India is far more traditional/orthodox than the North .. so there are very few places where you can 'live in' without being heckled .....

Some of my Indian friends abroad are into 'live ins' and have not yet revealed this to their parents ! ..... Well they do face a lot of problems ...... Like a friend of mine who is a student in the US is Living in with her American Boyfriend .... Things got complicated after they both visited India for the holidays ... Her parents were not at all happy .....I am not going to tell u any details, but you can guess what happened..... Now her relationship with her parents is permanently strained ....I have known her and her family for a long time ... and she was the apple of her parents eye being their only daughter and being very successful in every way... Now their relationship is really in a sorry state ..

So i guess the choice is yours about whether you r cool with it or not ,but u should def be open about it ...

So whats my decision ? Is India ready ... well its a big NO like jay said ... and when will it be ready ?...Not until we have had white hairs .....

[Look at my Avatar pic , I already have white hairs ]

Originally Posted by ShAdOwCoN

So i guess the choice is yours about whether you r cool with it or not ,but u should def be open about it ...

Cheers mate! where were u whole day? I was kinda "live in" alone here...

Originally Posted by jee.ramesh1983

Indian society wont welcome this.......
As a youth many of us would welcome this.....
Think from a parent's point of view....
Would you allow ur daughter or son (If you have) in such a relationship....

Originally Posted by sb21pro

well tell me ,will we allow this to our children?

there is only one answer from my end to both questions,

Yes
Tommorow if i will find my kid in such relation then i will not give a strange look as if i really don't know anything about this and as just4kix said about sex education so that is something which we need to take care, its already high time, in other countries like UK and US they get to know all these things in schools only thats the reason they are so open to talk about all this.

The things which we can just think in india are actually available there and doing good, there are different ways we look in this live in relation but according to me its ok and not really a bad thing, as it provides you a good time to understand your partner before marriage and can give you an idea of his/ her personal life that how good he/she is with home work and surroundings.

Now may be few people will not agree with me but thats true

At the end even i agree that Indian Society is not ready for that but we can make a difference